Structure

I have outlined my whole book in a four-part structure.  A detailed spreadsheet that provides a map for where I’m going.  I know which scenes have yet to be written and what information needs to be included based on where it falls in the structure. 

I had resisted putting structure to my writing.  I had thought it should grow organically, flow at will.  I never saw myself as rigid or someone who could not function without structure.  More typically, I see myself as a loosey-goosey, go with the flow, flexible kind of person.  But maybe that’s just what I tell myself? 

I fidget when boundaries at work are unclear; worry endlessly about a camping trip until I start a list; am paralyzed by a day without any scheduled plans. 

So it seems structure is more than welcome—as long as I am not beholden to it at all costs.  I do my best to plan, to make sure all is thought through, and then if everything falls apart, I  g o  w i t h  t h e  f l o w.  The cost and consequences of control are too high.  And because at my core, I have a scary, industrial-strength stubborn streak, I will break any controlling situation. 

In my struggle to get healthy, I have yet to find a structure that works.  I find myself feeling stubborn when I know I need to cook a healthy meal or get outside for a hike.  And how crazy is that to be in a battle of wills with myself? 

So to Excel I go, to create a another structure that maps out where I want to go to be healthy and strong.  Spreadsheets are a perfect non-threatening tool.  Easy to modify, print-out, and tape to the refrigerator.  We'll see...